I am Not a Quitter

2.12.2006
I have never been an exceptionally amazing person, and there have been times, looking back, that I wouldn't even classify myself as a good person. I have been mean to people who probably didn't deserve it, I have been selfish and, most of all, I have always been a quitter. I have come home early from trips due to homesickness, I have gotten distracted, disenchanted, and overwhelmed by activities and obligations and simply not seen them through.


I have been on a life path for the last two years or so that heads away from that person, but I always harbor in the deepest recesses of my being a fear that, when push comes to shove, that quitter is going to jump into the captain's chair, throw on the reverse thrusters, and get us the hell out of there. This morning, when I got home at 12:30 on the night before my first half-marathon, that quitter whispered to me, "You know, you don't HAVE to go. You haven't really run much this week, you might not make it." So I set my alarm and went to bed knowing that I might just sleep through it in the morning. At 6:30 a.m., I lay in bed thinking of all that I had to do to get ready for the race and what little time I had in which to get it done. Another perfectly reasonable excuse for lying in, but I got up, packed my bag, and headed out the door.


The race was hard. I started out at 9.5/10 minute miles, but the hills slowed me down (and the lack of sleep slowed me even further). All along the route, the TNT coaches were cheering us on, jogging beside us, asking how we were doing. I never felt pain, though my shoulder did grind at a few key moments, I was simply going. Two and a half hours of running is a long time. It was not easy, but it was never impossible, which left the greatest impression on me. I remember thinking that this was a definite possibility.


I would like to tell you that 6:30 this morning was the last time I heard from our temptress, the quitter, but she was with me all along that course. There was a time in the 7th mile that the course doubled back on itself and people were running in both directions, and I could have turned and cut a mile out of my race, but I wanted to finish the whole thing. I wanted to be able to tell people that I ran the 13.1 (and believe me, I do). I wanted to be able to wear my finisher's medal and not feel like a fraud. The legend of Pheidippides running from Marathon to Athens might be a myth, but I couldn't see myself concocting a story, I wanted the real thing.


SO I may not necessarily have been a nice person in my youth; and as I settle into adulthood, I would not call myself great. I am, however, comfortable: with who I am, with what I can do, and, most importantly to me, with looking people in the eye. I am not a quitter. I am an endurance athlete, in the race of life, and beyond.

Thanks so much to Hooters Mission Valley for all of their help. They were wonderful! 

The First Ever Charity Poker Tournament at Hooters was a huge success. We raised $800 that night.  

Our winner: walk coach Roger 

From the Halfway Point

Last Saturday I ran 13 miles in two hours and seventeen minutes. No earth-shattering feat, I know, but I started thinking: If anyone had tried to tell me when I started thinking about training for this marathon that I would be running thirteen miles and then going on with my life as if nothing had happened, I would have never believed them. Yet that is exactly what I did. I ran, then went to yoga, then went to my bookclub meeting. A typical day that happened to include running a half-marathon. So as I reach the halfway point of my training, I have realized a few things:
1. Never make any life-changing decisions before running on them for a while (it clears the head like nobody's business).
2. Anyone can do this, all it takes is patience.
3. No... I can't drink like a fish the night before and then get up and run. My body doesn't like it and my body has its ways of making its opinions known.
4. When people tell you that you shouldn't wear cotton socks, you should listen to them. I don't know how I managed to get blisters in the arches of my feet, but I did.
5. Never underestimate yourself. The body is an amazingly resiliant organism that can meet most any challenge.

I run the San Dieguito half marathon on Sunday, so I might have more insights after that, but I am fairly confident now that I will finish this marathon in May without a problem, and that is a great thing to know.